From mboxrd@z Thu Jan 1 00:00:00 1970 Return-Path: Received: from smtp1.linuxfoundation.org (smtp1.linux-foundation.org [172.17.192.35]) by mail.linuxfoundation.org (Postfix) with ESMTPS id 57F72109C for ; Tue, 25 Sep 2018 06:46:24 +0000 (UTC) Received: from mail-oi1-f171.google.com (mail-oi1-f171.google.com [209.85.167.171]) by smtp1.linuxfoundation.org (Postfix) with ESMTPS id D10B727B for ; Tue, 25 Sep 2018 06:46:23 +0000 (UTC) Received: by mail-oi1-f171.google.com with SMTP id m11-v6so588916oic.2 for ; Mon, 24 Sep 2018 23:46:23 -0700 (PDT) MIME-Version: 1.0 References: <20180924181138.GA16086@tuxdriver.com> In-Reply-To: From: Dan Williams Date: Mon, 24 Sep 2018 23:46:10 -0700 Message-ID: To: daniel.vetter@ffwll.ch Content-Type: text/plain; charset="UTF-8" Cc: olof@lxom.net, Greg KH , ksummit Subject: Re: [Ksummit-discuss] [TECH-TOPIC] Review - Code of Conduct: Let's revamp it. List-Id: List-Unsubscribe: , List-Archive: List-Post: List-Help: List-Subscribe: , On Mon, Sep 24, 2018 at 9:29 PM Daniel Vetter wrote: > > > > Thomas Gleixner schrieb am Di., 25. Sep. 2018, 00:22: >> >> On Mon, 24 Sep 2018, Olof Johansson wrote: >> > Ah yes, Popper's Paradox. The answer is not that we have to be >> > tolerant of the intolerant -- or at least not infinitely. We also all >> > know that people need a bit of time to adjust to new habits and I >> > think we should focus more on (quick) improvement over time than >> > absolutes. We're all humans. >> >> That's the important point here: we are _all_ humans. That includes those >> who occasionally lose their temper (I know what I'm talking about and I >> know for sure that it is a life long struggle to control it). >> >> If someone puts that person in his place, that's absolutely correct and >> necessary. Most people immediately react, regret and apologize and they >> mean it. >> >> Now if someone gets put in his place and the person who does that then goes >> one step further and asks (privately) what's wrong and what caused that >> pointless explosion, in other words deeply cares about the other person who >> failed, then a way deeper change happens than just using the Code of >> Conflict/Conduct as a one edged sword. > > > > All this coc asks you to do is stop putting yourself first and start considering others. Instead of lashing out and then expecting your recipients to also handle the fallout for, plus showing deep empathy for the harassment they just received. >> >> >> Then 'be excellent to each other' becomes what it's really meant to be. > > Seems rather one way instead of mutual, what you have in mind. Speaking only for myself, I didn't read it that way. I read it that empathy is a 2-way street and there has to be room for accountability and forgiveness in both directions otherwise the conversation does not move forward.